Short Movie About the Power of “Validation”
The principle of validation can take on many meanings in English or any other language.
The best definition I’ve come up with (as it relates to human potential) is this 10-word sentence: ”A specific acknowledgment of appreciation for a task well done.”
But the most curious thing about validation is that it feels just as good to the person who does the validating as it does to the person who gets validated.
As a trainer and teacher, I feel the most validated if one of my students unexpectedly shows their appreciation by verbally acknowledging the time and effort I put into designing the tele-curriculum.
How and why they show their validation is important to me, but when the validator is specific about what they appreciate about my training, it makes me feel even better.
Key Point: The more specific the validation, the better it feels to the person who gets validated.
As a parent, I feel the most validated when my wife, Aimee and my two kids Gabriel and Breanna, participate in our early morning “What I appreciate most about you …” round-robin during breakfast.
It’s a simple game of specific validation that any family can play.
It takes just 8 minutes out of our day and it’s a great mental booster that inspires us to blast any unexpected challenges.
Okay, so you’re probably thinking, “That’s great Alex, but what about the ’short movie’ you promised in the headline?”
Keep reading … I’ll give you the direct link at the end of this post. But, if you just can’t wait, just visit YouTube (Search: “validation”).
When you see it, you’ll discover the movie already has hundreds of thousands of views and it still holds a 5-Star Rating (Running Time: 16 mins, 23 secs).
I really appreciate my friend, Peter Einstein for emailing me the link to this YouTube movie a few days ago because it is inspiring, funny and cleverly directed. (Read the comments posted by other viewers to see what I mean).
Key Point: Validation is an observable act and human behavior that espouses both appreciation and gratitude.
The reason I believe this is because validating someone else requires specific and observable acknowledgement.
As such, appreciation is an “Outer Game” (doing) activity that is public and “interpersonal.”
I also feel grateful when I validate someone for a task well done, but my gratitude is not as observable. It’s more personal or “Inner Game” (feeling) activity.
Put another way, appreciation is the doing part of gratitude.
Makes sense so far, yes?
Okay, so what the heck does validation have to do with marketing your business or accelerating your business growth?
I have a ONE word answer and here it is: EVERYTHING!
Entrepreneurial CEOs: MBWA, “Management By Wandering Around,” was a favorite business acronym since the early 80’s, when Tom Peters and Robert Waterman made this Hewlett-Packard hallmark famous in In Search Of Excellence.
MBWA is the fastest, easiest and most reliable way to authentically validate your team, vendors and independent contractors.
Take time to visit (or fly-in) your support team members. Face-to-face appreciation feels more validating to receivers than ear-to-phone appreciation. Wouldn’t you agree?
Information Publishers: You will attract more ”Second Sale” customers (a.k.a. ”multi-buyers”) when you validate them as soon they buy from you for the first time.
My multi-buyer students have 6 to 8 times greater lifetime value (LTV) than my one-time buyer students! If you don’t believe me, then I hope you compete with me ;-)
Key Point: A multi-buyer is making a purchase during a different transaction session. Multi-buyers may buy an “upsell” offer during their initial purchase, but they’re not multi-buyers until they make their second purchase.
If you’ve ever taken any one of my tele-trainings such as Teleseminar Secrets then you already know that you get “alumnus status” the moment you complete the course the first time.
My alumni consistently get validated whenever they purchase a second training from me because every training they invest in after the first one is always half price!
(In essense, I rebate them a 50% affiliate commission in advance for referring themselves).
My alumni often tell me (by phone or in person) how validated they feel for saving big money and getting preferential treatment.
And why shouldn’t I prefer them over newer students? My student alumni are like family to me. If you’re an info publisher, marketer or trainer, give this strategy a fair try. It can and will double your income without any cash outlay … it’s WIN-WIN.
My students WIN by saving money and getting preferential treatment. And I WIN by increasing my income without spending a single penny more on promotion or marketing costs. You can do the same!
(If you don’t believe me again - and I’m not kidding – I really hope we compete with each other).
Small Business Owners: Your business becomes more productive (and profitable) when you validate others with consistency, frequency and authenticity. (Please read that sentence again – twice!).
The 3 most important concepts in the previous sentence are: consistency, frequency and authenticity.
In study after study conducted by Motivation Research firms since the 1920s, an employee’s #1 motivation for staying with the company (even with paycuts) is appreciation - a.k.a. “validation.”
But don’t take my word for it, try it yourself for the next 21 days and watch what happens to your bottom-line ;-)
Parents & Family: Your kids or family members will feel validated by you when you play a simple game called: “What I appreciate most about you …”
I already talked about this game earlier in this blog post, one thing we’ve found to work really well is it’s great breakfast, lunch or dinner icebreaker. Instead of looking at our plates and eating, or forcing a conversation, we just play!
One of the most validating humans I know, Bonnie Bruderer taught me this simple game and my wife, Aimee and I have adopted it as “breakfast of champions” fodder.
If you have kids, try it a few times because the only rules of the game is to speak the truth and look at the person you’re validating straight into the eyes.
Here’s the template:
“What I appreciate most about you today is … [Fill in a specific, observable behavior you want to validate]“
Key Point: In our experience, the “What I appreciate most about you today…” game is more personal and has a lot more impact than the “high-low of the day” game many families play at dinner time.
Here’s the thing – the power of verbal validation with someone you appreciate and acknowledge provides an “Outer Game” context for feeling grateful. I’d call it interpersonal gratitude - no one is left on the sidelines because everyone plays :-)
Thought Leaders: Jack Canfield makes a weekly commitment to validate at least 10 people on his team or in his student body. He says it gives him chills every time he does it and it never gets old.
Oprah Winfrey validates members of her student audience by giving away prizes such as cars, trips and other thoughtful gifts.
I have yet to see her embarrass any other guests with controversy or finger-pointing. Instead, Oprah chooses to validate her guests with plenty of hugs and compliments.
I’m only guessing, but maybe Oprah’s ability to validate (and not criticize) is why she is a billionaire today.
What To Do Now: If you want to start experiencing wild success in your personal and professional life, then start validating those who are closest to you. Take the power of validation seriously. Make it a habit.
Validate with passion and repetition (consistency). Validate often (frequency). And always, always, speak from your heart (authenticity), not just your head, whenever you validate someone special.
Easy right?
Aim for going “3-for-3″ which means validating others with consistency, frequency and authenticity.
Give it a try so those closest to you can have the opportunity to acknowledge you as a world-class manager, entrepreneur, spouse, parent, friend, relative or whatever role you play during your lifetime.
The Short Movie: Look, I could go on and on about how the simple act of validating others can lead to a spectacular life. But I don’t believe my own words can even hold a candle to this 16-minute video I want you to watch now.
So congratulations, you made it this far – you’re one of the few who do!
The move will take just 16 more minutes out of your day, but what you’ll discover will last you a lifetime.
When you’re done, please leave your comment below and let me know what you think. I like seeing lots of comments because I’m wired for validation just like everybody else.
Your courtesy will be most appreciated.
Click here to watch it on YouTube and then make the decision to validate at least one business colleague, vendor, strategic alliance partner or family member each day in 2009.
Tags: alex mandossian, customers, gratitude, info publishing, Jack Canfield, online marketing, oprah winfrey, tom peters, validation, Yahoo, youtube
Awesome article.
I have always tried, key word tried, to validate as many people as I can, because I know that I like to be validated or appreciated.
It’s sad, but we aren’t groomed for that in our society today.
I will watch the video now.
Thanks Brian
[...] Mandossian made a post on twitter which lead me to his blog post here: Short Movie about the power of validation This is a business [...]
I’m such a sap but this movie really made me cry and also inspired me to post to my blog:
http://www.marketersmojo.com/619/validation/
I absolutely agree that this is a lifetime skill.
Thanks SO much for sharing the video and your thoughts!
Angela Wills
Alex thank you for sharing this video and your message today about appreciation. What an awesome gift for me today! I appreciate your willingness to share and provide such value to each and everyone that you make contact with. I look forward to completing the Teleseminar Secrets program and launching my teleseminar on Jan 27! With heartfelt gratitude…
http://hasanyonetoldyou.com/
Just in case, please let me be the one today.
Alex,
Thank you very much for your acknowledgment, thank you for noticing. I am extremely appreciative, since you are one of the people I admire most, on the planet, as a mentor.
What I APPRECIATE most about YOU today is: Your capacity to lead others from behind, and bring out the best in them, so that they can validate others.
A wise man once said, there are two types of leaders. The kind that does the best they can, and the kind that would do whatever it takes. I would argue that there is another type. The leader that leads from behind. In my opinion, this is the most valuable type of leader. Alex, you truly exemplify leading from behind. Thank you for teaching us all that we need to know in order to succeed in this business. You teach with such grace and heart-centered compassion and wisdom, that is it almost impossible NOT to follow your suggestions.
Alex, I hope you are aware of the impact you have on so many people’s lives. Before I had met you, I listened to a CD you had made with Mark Victor Hansen. You listed 21 tips to get the most out of a MEGA Event. Even those tips shaped my life dramatically. Three specifically, unpacking your suitcase the night you get home from an event. (even if just a metaphor for closing one chapter and opening another). Selecting a mentor buddy, whom I am fairly sure I have the best one on earth. Lastly, writing Thank You notes. (Tip 6) Although I have done this since I was a child, the best thing to come out of this tip, was a friendship and business relationship with you.
Alex, I admire you as a true leader, a mentor, and friend. I admire you for the obvious success that you have had with your career and Teleseminar Secrets, and I admire and appreciate you MORE for the success you have created in the hundreds of thousands of lives that you have led from behind, with your teachings. You may or may not be aware of the ripple effect of your leading from behind, and I want to remind you how massive it is.
Thank you for doing what you do, thank you for being an elegant leader from behind, thank you for being a successful mentor to model, and extraordinary teacher, and most importantly, thank you for being YOU! I appreciate you showing the path to jumping off the cliffs, into the rocks!
I look forward to being one of your led from behind millionaires this year! Thank you! I appreciate the work you do.
I too found this movie inspiring! Thanks for adding your insights as to how validation applies to all areas of life. Appreciation is one of the best “abundant gifts” we can offer another person, and it’s one of those gifts that blesses the giver as much as the recipient.
Diane Eble, publishing coach and author of Abundant Gifts: Daily Discoveries of God’s Goodness”.
Alex thank you for this wonderful article. The video touched my heart. What a wonderful way to begin the New Year 2009…by making it a resolution to validate as many people as we can this year. Awesome!
I would have to say I think that as the old saying goes “Practice What You Preach”…you do validate people and I love how you have treated me as an alumni. It is so nice to be paying $20.00 as a VIP rather than the $97.00, etc. For those special seminars. I hardly ever miss one and I come away feeling a winner myself because I haved received so much value for my $20.00. Plus the fact that as an alumni I know that I can take Teleseminar Secrets and Virtual Book Tours for the rest of my life. Now how could I ever beat that???? Looking foward to another great year!
Bobbi Henderson
Hi Alex,
This was the most powerful 16 minute message that me and my wife have seen in a while. At by the awards and film festivals that this short film won proves that this film struck a cord with many people.
As a transformational trainer, I make it a point to validate strangers that I meet, or even say hello too, every chance I get. People in our society are under appreciated and sometimes just a little hello will mean the world to them, as was the case with the lady in the wheelchair.
I teach to all my students that the way they are OFF the stage, is exactly the way that they will be perceived ON the stage. So why not make it a point to share a smile or hello with people you don’t even know. Someday they will be in your training and the validation that they received might be the one thing that changes their life for the better.
Ja’son Manwill
The Transformational Trainer’s Coach™
http://www.jasonmanwill.com
Alex:
You always get back what you give. It is no wonder that you are constantly validating other people in their actions. Nicely done is not just a catch phase for most of your tribe.
It constantly revalidates why you are held in such esteem by your tribe.
Rob Metras
http://www.whatsmyspin.com
Thank you Alex for bringing this vid to my attention. You are awesome and I love the fact that you are committed to helping others become more successful.
Amazing what a simple smile and validation does for others. Keep up the great work and I look forward to working with you personally in 2009!
:-)
Alex,
What we appreciate the most about you being students and working with you over the past 3 years.
Is how much we know that you wish others to succeed in there chosen journey.
You are the most heart centered trainer that we have ever met.
Thank you for allowing us to be part of your tribe.
– Pat & Lorna
http://PatAndLorna.com
Hi Alex,
Thank you for this great article on the power of validation. When you think about it, validating someone is really just another form of expressing our gratitude for that individual.
When you take time out to highlight what you appreciate about a person you’ll receive more of the same. It therefore significantly helps to strengthen your relationships.
All too often people are quick to point out what they don’t appreciate about a person but instead of this empowering an individual to change for the better, it often has the opposite effect. What a different place this world could be if everyone conscientiously practiced the art of validating.
I’m truly excited about the opportunities to increase doing this in my own life.
Best wishes
Nickolove
Peace & Greetings Alex,
Way back in the fall of 2006 I stepped out on Faith and prayed that somebody could teach me how to Fly away to my “Happy Place” Doing what I loved to do, TRAVEL! What happened was that I got hit with a tidal wave called The Human Potential Movement. I had never heard of such a thing working in my Hospital laboratory JOB! But now that I was a rookie business owner, some good people were trying to tell me something. They told stories of ‘Third Party Validation” with the “Expert”. Huh?
What was shared with me has changed my life and soon the life of my Grandson-to-be.
The Human Potential Movement is merely coaching you on your Own Game! A Game you love to play. A game others love to play with you. The more players in the game, the more Fun. The More Fun, the more Fortune. I’m with that! Put me in Coach! I’m ready to Play!
Here is a short list of Coaches; Life and Business, that have come into the 3rd quarter of my life to work with me on validating my own Potential. ( and work on my weaknesses: Use of the Telephone and Goal Setting)
J. Lloyd Tomer, Founder, Your Travel Biz ~ pod cast “Hitching your Wagon to the right Horse” My Head Coach and General Manager, We Love you Coach!!
Keith Hipp, Director, Your Travel Biz ~ Sunday Team NuHorizion Call
Michael S. Clouse, Author ~ The Fifth Principle
Myron Golden, Author ~ The Ebony Treasure Map and The“Hour to Empower” Teleseminar series
Dwayne Golden, Teleseminaian ~ “The Hour to Empower” and The Stealth Internet Marketers series
Rick Raddatz , Founder, Xiosoft ~ “Internet Software Tool Guy”
Armand Morin, marketing guru and How to Guy!
Raymond Aaron, My Life Coach and Goal setting guru
And last but not least……The Head Coach for My Greatest Weakness who’s turning it into My Greatest Strength…..Mr. Alex Mandossian !!!!!
God Bless you all! Your Travel Buddy, Greg Snead http://www.SneadsTravel.biz
Hi Alex,
I appreciate you sharing the “validation” video and your family breakfast ritual. I appreciate how you attract amazing faculty and students into your teleseminar secrets training. I appreciate how available you are to you students.
I appreciate you deciding on posting 2 times per week on your blog. You’re a great role model. I plan to follow suit with my blog(s).
In appreciation,
Phil Johncock
Follow me on Twitter
http://twitter.com/PhilJohncock
P.S. I heard from relationship experts that there are on an average 7-8 complaints for every appreciation. You are helping change this ratio!
Alex,
Thanks so much for your excellent post on validation.
The movie is terrific and I plan to pass it on to others. Not enough people show appreciation for others. It does make a huge difference and is so important!
Thanks for the reminder,
Chris King
In my youth, I was fortunate to spend one week each year away from home at summer camp. One practice at this camp was so proufound that I still practice it daily today.
At the end of each day, just before bed, all of the campers gathered together in the lodge. The administrators went over any announcements and camp business and then the floor was opened up for what was called simply “positives.”
Positives meant that the floor was open for anyone to stand up and thank another camper or staff member for something, or share a positive experience you had that day. It was one of the most remarkable experiences of my life. What a way to end (or as you do, begin) each day.
I saw seemingly troubled kids transform into givers right before my eyes because they received so much validation.
In essence, it was so profound, it became a habit that I know shaped the person I am today.
Here’s a positive for you Alex:
I appreciate you. You inspire me. Thank you.
Live Your Dreams,
Jill Koenig
Alex,
I have been following your blog for few weeks now. I truly appreciate the openess and abundance mentaliy you display though your vast sharing of information. I am going to share your post with others so that they too will share with others.
Thank you
Raymund
http://www.raymundpang.blogspot.com
Alex – thank you so much for the video and your post. I actually think your well-written blog on appreciation did more than hold a candle to the video. :) It is a really great post that has me re-committed to practicing appreciation on a daily basis. Thank you!!!
Along that line – I really appreciate the integrity that you have. I was struck by your integrity and authenticity the very first time I met you and now, two years later, am finally able to take your course. I am truly honored to be studying with you. Thank you!
Well I posted this on my facebook and sent it to some friends. One unexpected response, after they watched the video, made today a really fabulous day for me…. Sharing is such a powerful way to change the world one person at a time! thanks again!
free downloads for achieving your 2009 financial goals for your family are at http://www.kidzmakecents.com
share the wealth every day!
Alex,
Great post…. :o)
What I like about you is that it does not matter to you whether one sleeps on a park bench, is lower class, is middle class or of high class, you treat them all as if they are equal and for that, I respect you to the highest…. You always encourage others to live in their higher self….
I currently live alone, but when I have a family, I would like to try that game out…. :o)
Thanks for the wonderful post….
Philip J. Mutrie
http://www.ExtremeInternetVideo.com
Hi Alex -
I love this video and am so grateful that you are recommending it on your blog – so many lives will be touched and influenced…
I appreciate you for your dedication, heart centered sincerity and fierce commitment to your students…
I appreciate your endless energy and generosity of knowledge, self, and spirit …
I appreciate the incredible example you set with everything you do…
I appreciate the awesome community you’ve created that I’m allowed to participate in…
But mostly I appreciate the love, dedication and commitment you show to your wife and children – it’s beautiful, admirable and rare…AND it gives me hope:-)
Great post, and a great vid. Simplistic I know, but imagine how different (and more peaceful) a place the world would be if we all stood still for a bit, took a deep breath, and did all of this.
Eugenie
This was a great video. It also honors the vision of our forefathers, the pursuit of life, liberty, and happiness. “Little actions, consistently taken, can produce big results.”
This is my very favorite quote from your class.
I posted the video on my blog, http://www.life-attractionsblog.com
May you continue to be inspired,
Alice Vlietstra
Good Morning Alex – What a great way to start the day! You are spot on! I was just talking to someone last nite that lost her husband of 49 years and how she was dealing with the loss.
I had the opportunity to have her talk about the the things she appreciated most about him and how grateful she was for being his partner for 49 years. She was able to focus on the laughs and the lessons that she had with him and bask in the good feelings of the love they shared.
She called me later that night to say that in 5 months since the loss she has never felt this good, this free or this loving.
If we only learned this earlier in our lives – a little appreciation makes way for a lot of motivation! Truly what we focus on is where our energy goes and what we get more of. IF we continued to focus of gratitude and appreciation we would see a tremendous difference in our selves, our families, our schools, our communities and our world. The “magic” that comes from gratitude and and acknowledgment permeates fear, anxiety, depression and all those emotional cancers that some allow themselves to be impacted by.
Alex – thank you for being so open both on a business and personal level. It is amazing how you so subtly embed life’s lessons into your business teachings. And those are the most important lessons of all. These lessons are the many keys to a life of love, happiness and fulfillment. I am honored to be have met you my friend!
Keep up the mission!
Cheers,
Mel
http://www.melabraham.com
This information is powerful.Alex mandossian you have a wonderful gift and that gift is to help people succeed in business.Alex keep doing what you love to do. arthur robinson jr.
Alex,
I had seen the video clip a while back but you added a great deal to it. Your setup and teaching compliments the video well. What a great way to lead people to receive more now by first being present and validating people in their lives.
It’s amazing to live this principle. I think it works because it taps us into who we were created to be.
Thanks for the contribution that you make to people everyday. Obviously, as you read these comments, you’re making a difference!
Norma Strange
PS – In case you’re wondering what I’m doing, I assist direct selling distributors to transition into solid business owners. They first need to build (validate) who they “BE” before they can effectively “DO” their network marketing or MLM business. We accelerate the time it takes to build their personal effectiveness following the proper sequence so they can shorten their path to success.
You gave me something to do for today and many days after this. The game will be to make others feel comfortable with themselves by just pointing out what they already know. Now all I have to do is state the obvious. It will be necessary to look at what is going on around me and then giving it a voice. Thanks for introducing me to the obvious. I can’t wait to see what the process will deliver.
Thank-you Alex, for this inspiration leading all of us enthusiastically into 2009!
Earlier in December, in planning for this year, I was going through Wattles “The Science of Getting Rich”, as presented by Bob Proctor. In that program, there is an entire chapter dedicated to Gratitude all on its own. It describes Gratitude as:
“the way in which you relate yourself in perfect unity of mind to the formless intelligence in a harmonious way”.
I think what this video equally demonstrates, is yet another premise in Wattles book, that…
“The moment you permit your mind to swell with dissatisfaction upon things as they are, you begin to lose ground. You fix attention upon the common, the poor, the squalid, and the mean – and your mind takes the form of these things. You will then transmit these forms or mental images to the formless. Thus the common, the poor, the squalid, and the mean will come to you.”
In these last 3-5 months I have consciously chosen to strip away all the excess in my life to experience just “being”.
To release my own dissatisfaction about certain things in my life, to give myself permission to re-discover and discover myself, and most of all to choose and give myself the freedom to focus on what I want to create and co-create with others moving forward.
So in this same spirit of gratitude, I want to thank-you Alex for the gift of being able to work through your training material “on my own time”. To do so has enabled me to truly launch my first webpages January 1st and teleseminar January 13th with my mentor Suze Casey, with whom I have wanted to promote our work for some time.
And now, with the training that I signed up for with you back in April at the ETR presentation now taking root, I have truly already begun to receive more… and more, and more… AND I continue to be pleasantly surprised at what happens when I believe that I CAN and do relate to that substance / my source through a deep and profound feeling of gratitude.
Alex, in your first module you talked about the voices in our heads… what we in the Belief Re-patterningTM Community call the “Inner Critic” and the “Inner Coach”.
As food for thought, and to add to your articulate sentiments in light of Wattles’ writing, I would like to ask everyone reading this posting on your Blog, to consider… “Do you really believe it?”
Do you really believe that the very Universe (or whatever you believe to be your source or higher power) in fact, would want to, CAN and DOES reciprocate in like kind – for you?
Because as inspiring as this YouTube clip is, that question ultimately remains and lingers as the crux upon which everything else flows… or doesn’t.
And I would further encourage you, that if your answer is “no” or “not yet”… to take a look at http://www.whatdoyouwantinstead.com as a way to assist you to move through the thoughts and behaviors that are holding you back from creating what you desire in and for your life.
…So here’s to truly believing that we CAN powerfully experience and surrender to enthusiastically investing in others and ourselves through appreciation and validation, and that the Universe DOES respond in like kind if not 10-fold!
In Spirit,
Tracey L. Sisson
Belief Re-patterningTM Practitioner
http://www.whatdoyouwantinstead.com
FANTASTIC!! Thank you Alex for your mentorship and unabashed joyfulness at what you do! Great post and just perfect short film – both celebrating the power of affirmation and appreciation.
As a child psychologist, my life has been dedicated to validating and restoring smiles to kids who have faced all kinds of adversities – helping them really feel their intrinsic worth and celebrating their God-given gifts.
As a loving husband and father of four, I humbly try to practice what I preach – and we, too, make regular rituals out of sharing our appreciation for one another at home.
Now, with your guidance once again (I’m going thru TSS for the second time), I’m about to launch my international speaking and coaching practice – hoping to spread this same joy to many more thousands of kids, parents, and families across the planet. Because we ALL have such wonderful value, and deserve to be validated!
Wow, that’s the first time I dared say “international.” Pray for me.
Thank you Alex, deeply, for your contagious enthusiasm.
Cheers,
- Dr. Peter
Family Success Coach
Alex,
Your postings are so inspirational. I now find myself looking forwad to your blogs.
so I will be reading them twice per week.
God bless you as you carry out your life mission
Dear Alex,
What a wonderful film! Thank you so much for sharing it! It starts so many thoughts I hardly know where to begin. One thing is that my wife is the volunteer coordinator at PATH People Assisting the Homeless. I volunteer there a lot. What I’ve discovered is that, when we treat people who are homeless with appreciation, and acknowledge their value and humanity, it has an astonishing effect.
Along the way, I have stumbled onto another, powerful kind of validation. It is LISTENING. Most people never actually listen to anyone else. We’re always too busy wanting to say OUR stuff. But when you really do listen to someone, it is immensely validating. I now have developed a course in listening that I have been teaching and giving seminars on. We can show our appreciation of people with our voices and we can also show them our appreciation with our EARS! Validation by listening has amazing results!
Thanks again, Alex, for sharing this film! I loved it!
David Evans
evansdavid43@yahoo.com
http://www.DavidEvansCommunications.com
(This actually is an old website that I will be taking down soon. I will be replacing it with the website from my current company, Breakthrough Innovations.)
P.S. This is the first time I have ever left a comment on your blog.
Alex,
This type of post requires some deep insight into ones self. It seems that you are not afraid to accept the validation of others. You have been an inspiration to me and so many others.
For me this article was timely, true and very much appreciated. Thank You!
Validation can change a person’s life. Thank you for this blog. Your children are so lucky to have a father like you.
This is a fascinating video. Go now to http://www.DoubleYourIncomeCHALLENGE.com and get rich.
“What I appreciate most about you today is … [Enriching my life sharing you're heart, knowledge, time and the video link.]“
I validate others on a regular basis and it works wonders! This movie is MUST SEE for absolutely everyone. He is a genius, thank you for sharing and translating.
Always,
Melissa
One thing I try to keep in mind is that real people with real challenges are asking questions on my ‘ask’ campaigns. They aren’t just another person on my list but a person that is looking for a genuine solution to their problem. It is important that I validate everyone I can.
On our most recent ask campaign http://www.askdrberg.com, people are describing chronic pain issues (back, knee, arthritis, shoulder, et al) that are interfering with their lives. In many cases, people can’t function normally due to their pain. I know our new product can create immediate & lasting pain relief but first and foremost, trust must be built. When I respond to them, and in some cases by personal email, I genuinely want to help them. This validation has come back in appreciation tenfold.
I guess what I am trying to share is that as I am running my business, I am also reminded that validation of our customers and potential customers is key.
Anything IS Possible,
Jan
Hi Alex,
I’m one of your past students and had the pleasure of meeting you at a reunion last year.
I want to validate you for always wanting to expose us to new ideas or ideas people may not have seen the full value of. Here is a fact to add to what you’ve already shared. Validating others not only enhances the person you are validating but also the validator. Every time we listen to someone tell us how they feel we need to internalize that feeling enough to understand what they’re saying. This is one of the reasons that therapists can get so depleted and depressed listening to clients say they are depressed, angry etc. repeatedly. When you spend your time looking for things to validate and endorse as wonderful in others you have to internalize that as well. So blessing others blesses our self.
Here’s another idea. I’ve asked my clients to experiment with this and they found a distinct difference. I have them notice how they feel when they say they are “grateful” or “thankful” versus
they “appreciate”. They notice that when they think about “appreciate” they draw closer to the thing or person that they’re appreciating. Some actually feel it as a pulling forward in their heart area.
Have a perfect day!
;-)
Shulamit
http://blog.limitfreeself.com
Getting you “Unstuck in Health, Self and Success
Rob,
I agree. Giving that precedes getting is like “sacrificing short-term profits in exchange for long-term wealth.”
~ Alex
Shulamit,
Thank you for your kind words and encouragement. I’m wired for validation just like anyone else and I enjoyed reading your reply.
~ Alex
Melissa,
Thanks for noticing. I’ve gotten feedback about the movie that ranges from “corny” to “meaningful.” In my view, anyone who feels it’s corny has an intimacy issue ;-)
Thanks for your reply.
~ Alex
Norma,
Long time no hear. Thanks for stopping by and I hope you make it to the TSS Reunion this year.
http://www.TeleseminariansUnite.com
Speak soon?
~ Alex
Alice,
If you like the “little actions” quote (thanks), then you’ll probably also enjoy an little-known Teleseminar I just recorded about “micro-decisions” at http://www.TeleseminarTestimonials. Go to #109 … you’ll see it there.
Thanks for commenting,
~ Alex
Diane,
Thanks. I figured this video was a perfect fit for what you stand for. Pass it on…
~ Alex
Dear Alex,
I have a sister-in-law that just walked out on my brother after his 5th difficult surgery. He was unable to care for himself when she left. She lost her mother at a young age, and along with Mom went her smile. She married my brother because he brought it back to her, as this movie portrays, but her pain ran deeper.
The entire time I saw this amazing video I thought of her. I’m going to send it to her, not for any purpose than her own life, and I’m going to pray that she can experience joy again.
Thank you for your commitment to living a life worthy of respect and soundness of speech. In doing so I pray those who would normally oppose you would find nothing bad to say. Remain humble.
Kellie
http://www.kelliefrazier.com
Hi Alex,
I actually watched this youtube video a couple of weeks ago and thought it was fabulous. Thank you for expanding on validation and bringing it to the forefront of conversation.
The appreciation game that you family does at breakfast is awesome.
I love that family is such a priority for you…not just family, but quality of family. I hear that from you in everything you do.
Thanks for the post.
Much love and aloha,
Dr. Amy
Thank you Alex. Recently I was the recipient of validation and it is wonderful. To see someone else’s value is to see our own. It is a truly powerful moment in time. Recognizing ourselves and others is the vitality of life!! This video brought tears to my eyes. So well done and such a great reminder to be great and recognize the greatness in others!!!
Thank you:))
Sloan
This is a incredible video I’m going to set up my facebook account so I can share it with others right now.I didn’t realize validation was so important to people!My 9to4 job is at the grocery store for now I’m going to try this there to see the responce I get.Thanks Kimberly Kabel
[...] also offered validation to total strangers I met on my daily [...]